no good cop stories unless I make one up:
Like the time I was walking down the street minding my own business when a Cop comes out of nowhere and grabs me and says "Hey Bwa! I think your lookin for a good time.." Before I could respond the cop forced him and myself down and open manhole, down a rusty ladder, then down a dark dirty tunnel until we came to a rusty metal door. The cop said "Knock three times BWA- don't make me shoot you!" So I knocked three times and instantly the door was answered by a mean-spirited dwarf with no arms. "Who the hell are- Oh hi lieutenant McKlusky- I take it this scumbag your with is looking for a good time?!", said the rat-like creature. "That's right Handy- tell him you want a good time, bwa!" said the cop as he poked my liver with his .45 snubnose. " Uh yeah , good time", I said beginning to get nervous. In an instant the door closed behind me, leaving just me and Handy in this strange environment. As I looked around it looked like some kind of weird underground pool party, where all the party goers where wearing hotdog and hamburger costumes. My psychic hunch told me that these 'weekend sandwich' folks were ALL cops-every last one- even Handy (no sandwich suit). It was at this point that I blacked out and my next memory was waking up in a cell in the 43rd precinct (Chi-town) coming to the conclusion that 3-4 of my ribs on my left side had been switched with my right side ribs. It was a similar feeling to wearing your shows on the wrong feet- everything looks OK but 'feels' way wrong. I soon was I-bonded and went home, later finding out that all charges had been dropped.

Yes all true, however in a parallel dimension (of miniscule probability)

- Davey